Days 1

Day #1 - 10 FACTS ABOUT ME:

1. I am a workaholic. I always say I am going to leave on time and I always say I will make it home before Hulk goes to bed, but the truth is that I never do. Ever. I only leave on time if I have another meeting scheduled for something else we are involved in. It is borderline ridiculous. Or maybe its just flat out crazy...

2. I over commit. See #1. I work a ton, I am on the Volleyball Board for the league Toot plays in, I am on the executive board for the sports organization, I have applied for the parks and recs board, I coach 2 volleyball teams, I play on a co-ed softball team. Toot plays vball and cheer. Over commit is my middle name. I really don't know how to stop it. If you need a volunteer, call me. I am your girl!

3. I had a cancer scare. I have been to a Gynecologic Oncologist and a Hemoncologist. I was having a lot of problems and it was finally discovered that I had a large cyst/tumor on the only ovary I had left. The GO refused to do surgery until I lost at least 100 lbs. That's why I had this surgery to begin with. It needed to be done. Once I lost the weight, we removed the tumor. It was a dermoid tumor, thank God. But after my surgery I had the blood clots so we also had to check for clotting disorders, in comes the Hemonc. I had to give my self shots of a blood thinner every day for 6 months, then again during my pregnancy because of it.

4. I have the greatest friends in the world. I cannot begin to tell you about them all. I have friends that have seen me at my best, at my worst, they have visited me in the hospital, listened to me cry, been there in the crazy times and had a million miles of fun with me. I have pictures of a few of them. I love them all dearly and cannot imagine my life without them. :)

 

 

5. I hide most of my feelings. It isn't hard to tell when I am happy, angry or sad, but the in between looks like a smile on my face. I am an emotional person. Its just who I am. I cry at the drop of a hat, I laugh loudly and I fight hard. I don't like it when people can read me. There are very few people that I totally open up to, they include: My best friend, Melissa, DH, Madre and Sister.

 

6. My family is my life. There isn't anything I wouldn't do for them. I would pull up wood floors (which I have done), I would stay in the hospital for them all night (which I have done), I would drive to timbucktoo and back...I just love them to death. My sister and I are 100% there for each other all of the time. She is always there when I need her including staying at the hospital with me after I had surgery. She was there for several nights then and a night after Hulk was born. I cant ever repay her for all she has done for me :)

 

 

 

7. I honestly don't know what else to write about myself :/ I am rather lame....lol

 



December Blog Challenge

To get me back into the habit of blogging, I decided to take the 30 Day December Blog Challenge. It goes as follows:

For every day of December, you must write about the topic for each day on that day.  Each topic is simple and gives a broad horizon of writing ideas.  You must write more than a few sentences, write as much as possible.

 

Day 1: Write Ten Facts About Yourself.  (You cannot do simple facts such as “I like cheese” and “Red is my favorite color.”  They must be long and you must explain each fact.)

Day 2: Your Dream Profession.  (Go into detail and explain your answer.)

Day 3: Who Are You Closest To? (Explain.)

Day 4: Write About One Of Your Biggest Secrets.  (It’s okay, you can trust us fellow Tumblr-users.  We won’t tell anyone.)

Day 5: What Are Your Obsessions?  (Explain why.)

Day 6: What Is Your Favorite Quote.  (Explain.)

Day 7: What Type Of Music Do You Favor?  (Write about the bands/singers you listen to.)

Day 8: How Did You Discover Tumblr?

Day 9: What Is One Thing You Use Every Day?

Day 10: Free Day.  (Write about anything you choose.)

Day 11: What Is Your School Status?  (Are you a nerd, jock, prep, bully, etc.  If you don’t have school, or are home-schooled, talk about what you would want your status to be.)

Day 12: Who Are Your Best Friends? (Why?)

Day 13: Write About Something That Happened To You This Week.

Day 14: Explain What Your Favorite Holiday Is, And Why.

Day 15: Write About Your First Kiss.  (If you haven’t kissed anyone yet, that is perfectly fine.  Just write about your first love/crush.)

Day 16: What Is Your Biggest Fear? (Explain.)

Day 17: Write About Someone/Something You Miss.

Day 18: Write About Your Favorite Book, Movie, Song, Food, Color, Animal.  (Explain each answer.)

Day 19: Who Is Your Idol?  (Explain why.)

Day 20: What Are Your Hobbies?  Why Do You Like Them?

Day 21: Write About Your Most Embarrassing Moments.

Day 22: What Is Your Style?

Day 23: Write About One Of Your Guilty Pleasures.  (It doesn’t have to be sexual.)

Day 24: Write About Your Day.

Day 25: If Your Could Meet/Have One Fictional Character Fall In Love With You, Who Would It Be? (Explain.)

Day 26: Explain Why You Chose Your Username(s).

Day 27: Write A Letter To All Of Your Followers On Tumblr.

Day 28: Write About Your Favorite Memory.  (Explain why it’s your favorite.)

Day 29: Write About Something/Someone You Can’t Live Without.  (Explain.)

Day 30: Free Day.  (Write about anything you choose.)

Day 31: It’s The Last Day Of The Year.  Write About Your Favorite And Least Favorite Memory Of This Year.  (Explain why.)

Starting over...again :)

I decided to take a page from my sister's book and start journaling every day again. I need to. I need to be more accountable. I will be more accountable.

 My last post was 11 very short months ago. I was pregnant with Hulk still....where do I begin to talk about the last 11 months?

April 2013: Hulk was born. It was one of the best days of my life that quickly turned into one of the scariest. I went to work just like I did every day. Hulk was low and killing my pelvis. He was huge for a 36 week baby, hence the name Hulk. Ha. Anyways, I stood up to go pee for the 900th time that day (It was 10am). When I did, I noticed that my pants were wet. I called my doctor immediately. Their advice was to go upstairs and let the L&D RNs check me out. They got me in a gown and check everything. They tested the fluid to make sure everything was okay since I had been leaking since the day before and didn't tell anyone. I told DH not to come up to the hospital yet, we didn't know if I was really in labor and why miss work for a mistake? When the nurse came back she told me I was dilated to a 6 so they were going to keep me but that it wasn't my water that broke. I had been steadily peeing on my self little by little for the last 24 hours. I felt like a dumbass. HAHA But it was time for Hulk to make his debut anyways :) I called the family, everyone showed up. About 15 minutes after my Daddy got there, the baby was here.

At 6:45 PM, 7 lbs 5 oz and 21" long, he was skinny and long. Not quite the Hulk we were thinking he would be had he gone full term. I got to hold him for a second before they took him to the nursery for observation since he wasn't breathing like he should have been. Of course the family stood and watched him for a while before they all went to dinner. About 30 minutes later the NICU nurse came into the room to tell me that Hulk was headed into the NICU. Turns out he had Pulmonary Hypertension, a murmur from 2 holes in his heart and a few other things going on. He was on CPAP and a feeding tube and lots of other lines and tubes and crazy things. I didn't get to see him until I went to the Post Partum room. It was after midnight. I was terrified. I couldn't even hold him. I held him for 2 minutes in his entire 8 hour life. That's it. The incubator was on, the CPAP was humming, IV beeping, his heart monitor was holding a steady rhythm and he looked helpless. We were there for 5 days when the neonate doc said we could go home. While we were getting ready he went into SVT. He did that 2 more times. We ended up there for 10 days total. I didn't get to hold him until day 4. He didn't get to breastfeed until day 6. But I sat up there every day from 8am-6pm and held him and loved him and watched him. Tubes were in and out, he did better and worse, he was tired and losing weight but sweet and cuddly. I cried every time I had to leave him. I have never gone through anything like this in my entire life. He was the biggest baby in that NICU.

It hurt worse that his sister couldn't see him or hold him. She was so sad. The first time she got to see him it was through a window because it was RSV season. He had all of his tubes in, but the doctors and nurses made it happen. DH wheeled Hulk the the nursery with the NICU nurse and Toot cried when she saw him for the first time. That was day 7. On Day 9 we found out the CDC decided the RSV threat was over and Toot got to go into the NICU and hold him. She was beyond excited. On day 10 we surprised her by going to pick up her brother and bringing him home. :) She has been his protector ever since. He lights up when his Toot walks into the room and just swells with love when she talks to him and plays and holds him. I have never seen 2 kids with so much love for each other. Maybe the 8 year difference helps. LOL

Now, 7 month later we have 2 kids and a crazy busy life. I wouldn't trade it for the world. I have gained 10 pounds the last few months, I stopped working out to have more time with the kids. I am saying now, to the whole world that I am taking those 10 lbs. back. Throwing those away. I am going to stay healthy for Hulk now that I have made sure he is healthy, I am staying active for my active Toot and getting sexy for my sexy DH. :)

Now I am going to hang lights and put the Christmas tree up :)

Losing and Losing and Losing, Oh My!

Jumped on the scale this morning. I am at 246.6!! 74.6 Lbs lost baby!!!

Lets take a look at some things that way 75 lbs so you can get an idea of how much I have lost:

A 75 lb Turtle:

A 75 lb Goat:

75 lbs of weed (I knew you all would like that one):

I lost these things. Well, one of these things. You take your pic. That weed makes me feel like I lost a lot but that goat and turtle make me feel like I lost a lot more.

Thank you again to all of you that support me. It is so exciting to experience this!!! And a big shout out to all of you going through this same thing. bariatric surgery isn't easy. I am willing to be as real as I can be with you.

Since I know that there are several of you that read my blog, feel free to email me anytime!!! And if you have a blog idea you want me to write about, let me know. I will gladly do it for you!

3 Months Post Op

Yep, on the 17th I was officially 3 months post op. Wow. I had my appointment on the 18th. I was 70 lbs down. Do you have any idea how incredible it feels to know that I have lost 70 lbs in 3 months? That is more than 20 lbs a month. Wow. I almost cried. This morning I got on the scale....I have lost 71.8 lbs. Holy shit.

I have never told anyone my weight before. I have always been too self conscious. But Today I am going to tell everyone. I was 321 at surgery. I told K if I ever hit 300 lbs I'd step in front of a bus. Then I found out I was 321. Wow. :( BUT not I am 249.2 OMG I am actually less than 250. Last time I was this weight was after C was born. :)

This is a short blog, sorry for that. BUT it is one of the best ones I have been able to write up to this point.


and one more time....I WEIGH LESS THAN 250 LBS!!!!!!!! AHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!

This week....

I gotta tell ya, this week has sucked. I cant seem to get my emotions in check. I am stuck on a bipolar-coaster and I cant figure out how to slow it down.

I'm not entirely sure I even know how I really feel. One minute I am loving life the next I am trying to figure out where everything went wrong. WTF is wrong with me? I think part of it is a lack of being around friends outside of work. Another part is probably my body just freaking the hell out.

I dont really know what else to say without crying or throwing my computer at the Christmas tree that is still up....this is stupid. I hate emotions. They are so girly and dumb.

THIS IS NOT ME, THIS IS NOT WHAT I DO. Its driving me crazy not being able to keep everything in check. : \



Also, I have baby freaking fever. I cant get pregnant until its been at least a year.....and I have baby freaking fever....BAHHHHHHHHHH


Anyone want to come kick me in the ass to get me back in gear?

I lost a first grader....

Yep, I got on the scale just before Christmas and I have lost 60 lbs. Well, now its 62. C weighs just over that....I have lost a first grader!!! WOO HOOO!!!! Tomorrow will be 3 months since I started the pre-op diet. Its been 2 1/2 months since surgery. I cannot believe how fast its coming off!!!

Well, this family has had so much time with friends and other family over the last few weeks. It has certainly been a great year Holiday wise. We finished off the rest of our Christmases. (Is that a real word? LOL) It was a blast. Santa treated C to a few GREAT gifts. She got "big girl presents" this year. A digital camera from her Papa, a netbook and UDraw from Santa, Roller Blades from Papa....we had to have the "now that you are a big girl and getting big girl presents you have to prove you are responsible enough to take care of them and keep them" talk. So far so good. It has only been a couple weeks though ha. Here are some pics from Christmas time....OH, and yes, I did get ANOTHER watch for Christmas. this one was from C and it is GORGEOUS. :) She knows just what her Mommy would like. Sweet baby girl.

At work, Santa and his elf came to visit. They stopped in for a quick photo op. It was cool to see something good going around up there. I do love my job :) I finally even got my sign for my office so people know where I am LOL

I am so thankful for where I work. It is filled with politics and drama and BS...but when you work with a bunch of women, what the hell do you expect? I have met some amazing people up there though. CH has been amazing. She and I aren't the type of friends that we have to talk everyday. We are the type of friends that can be brutally honest with each other and know its in our best interest....we are the type of friends that no matter what, we know the other will be there in our time of need and even if we disagree about something we will always have each others back. She was pummeled by Due (the dog we are puppysitting for a while) when she came over to bake Christmas cookies with C. I <3 her. She is southern belle with white trash and badass all rolled into one. My whole family likes her, and naturally her family likes me. Who wouldn't? I'm Awesome....Which remind me of a song I will post in a minute...

RP came over too. He enjoyed Duke as well. He is crazy as hell. Duke, not RP....though RP can only be described as crazy. I have known RP since I was a Senior in HS. We met through a mutual friend. RP and I had an instant connection. We are 2 peas in a Bi-polar pod. We are alike in so many ways...hell, we have sisters with the same name and even our FB passwords are almost exactly the same. Its crazy how in sync we are. Its scary how in sync we are. HA But C LOVES her some RP. She cannot get enough of him. When he came over, She was around him pretty much the whole time.

 

 I know I talk about my friends and K a lot but without them, I would still be sitting on my fat(er) ass, eating Flamin' Hot Cheetos and wishing I wash getting in shape. Now, I am doing it. Emotionally these people are the ones that can get me through anything. I have several other people that help...SD has become someone I turn to often. I ran into someone at work on Friday that I haven't seen in a while. He is an amazing person. He makes me want to grow and become a better person. There aren't a lot of people today that can really inspire me to be better....but he does. He seems to dabble in everything and be pretty good at it. Dr. L is his name (for blog's sake). When I saw him I was walking onto my old unit and he told me to come here....I had no idea who the hell he was talking to. I stopped and asked if he was talking to me because who wants to be the moron that walks up to say HI and then gets looked right past? LMAO NOT ME!!! But I did walk over and he gave me a hug, said I looked great and told me I was doing a good job. So Dr. L, thank you for inspiring me. Thank you for supporting me. I hope I see you around more often so I can be constantly reminded to be a better me :)

I have been reading a lot more lately. Fiction, Non-Fiction, self awareness...everything. I cant get enough. I have read a new book every night this last week. This week was all fiction....I go through those the fastest. That is probably because they don't hold my interest like others. I love series of books, trilogies and series. They keep things interesting. I LOVE how you can read a book from Stephen King and catch things that he references in other books. I love it. It makes you think. I love to think......I love puzzles. They make you use your brain....I love being smart and making myself smarter. How nerdy do I sound right now? Wow...

Here are some random pictures I have taken....the first one is a pink heart cloud that was floating in front of me when I left for work on Friday. I thought it was pretty. i am kind of impressed with the picture really LOL Then there are a couple pics of Duke (yellow) and Sasha (black). Paco hasn't wanted his pic taken lately...bone head. I love these dogs like my furry babies. :) The last two are recent pics of me :) I can finally wear the shoes I bought back in 2008 or 2009. I LOVE them. I love zebra period. lol I was too fat before to wear them, I could feel the heel bowing under the pressure of my weight. NOW THEY DON'T DO IT!!! LOL 

I hope everyone has an amazing NYE :) PLEASE DON'T DRINK AND DRIVE and have a freaking blast :) Lets make 2012 the year of greatness!!!!

And before I forget the Awesome songs that I love....